'Could it be Menopause?'

One week after my twins graduated from high school, I was thinking about how I would celebrate this big milestone and where I would go to mark this accomplishment of raising twins under some challenging life circumstances, when I woke up one morning and got half way to the bathroom, and my upper back completely froze and stopped me in my tracks. I spent the next few days in bed, and knew that some bed rest would solve this all and I would be back to normal shortly. I could never be so wrong. This was the beginning of a summer of extreme body pain, sleepless nights and by September I was experiencing severe anxiety which was not something I had much experience ever before in my life.

I struggled everyday with thoughts of, “Why is this happening?…What is going on?…My body has never been so stiff and in so much pain!” I didn’t recognize myself and I seriously wondered if I was becoming chronically ill. I needed answers and relief fast. So I tried a chiropractor for the first time in my life to see if she could release my neck. It worked for a few days, but then the pain was back. Then I went to my doctor for advice. She gave me two different prescriptions for pain and suggested a physiotherapist for the pain in my neck and shoulders. I tried physiotherapy for weeks with no huge improvements.

In the midst of all this, I noted that my monthly period was just a few weeks overdue when all this pain started. “How strange”, I thought, as my periods are so regular. “Surely, it would be back again soon”. So I went back to my doctor in early September, as now I had a list of about a dozen unusual symptoms, from numb feet to a sensitive bladder and my anxious thoughts were debilitating. I told my doctor that I was losing my mind and that my period was now two months overdue and asked, “could it be menopause?" She laughed and said “I hear this all the time…of course you are in perimenopause and we will check your FSH levels in the spring…come back then”. Ugh, seriously! I couldn't wait until then. I couldn't live like this. In that moment, I knew I had to find out what was going on and how to solve this on my own.

I learnt over the next few months that there isn’t as much help in the area of menopause as I had hoped. I knew that I needed some answers to my hormones and I did eventually find some pieces of the puzzle in the form of caring professionals. Tests did confirm that my FSH levels were in the post menopausal range and that my hormones were severely depleted. Little by little, slowly but surely I unravelled the pain, insomnia and anxiety over a period of 4-5 months. It was not easy as there was no roadmap or blueprint to follow that I could find. In fact, it had already taken me months to even realize that the pain, anxiety and insomnia were menopause. I knew about hot flashes, but this pain - I was not at all prepared for. I created a plan for myself that included truly nourishing my body and mind in the right way for me, and regular weekly tools and assistance that took self-care to a whole new level. I was able to find the right mix of rest and the right kind of exercise. I stuck to my routine and slowly saw my symptoms disappear or lessen to a great extent. But most of all, the joy in my life came back.

I also knew after this horrific experience that I was not the only one suffering silently. Every woman goes through the menopause transition and sometimes it’s more bumpy than we expect. If you are a woman who is struggling with menopause symptoms like pain, anxiety, and insomnia, and want to ease the transition and find more peace and vitality in your body, know that there is hope. That you don't need to struggle and there absolutely are things you can do to take back control of your health.

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